Day 40 is ominus with so many religious and biblical events. In the christian calender - lent was seen as a way to place god at the centre of the world and relfect, stemming from Jesus going into the desert to battle the devil. Moses spent 40 days and 40 nights to find contemplation and renewal. I guess thats what this has been to me a way to battle the demons and seek some form of peace and renewal, while constantly moving on and freeing myself from the past chains without major harm to self or others.
I looked today for someone who was blogging from the Camino de Santiago de Compostela but I think it is too early in the day, they are probably still walking, I thought it would be good to see what they are doing right now on their fortieth day, so close to thier destination, to walk up the cathedral steps after such a monumental journey.
I am still trying to work out my trip next year. For my fortieth birthday, do I go for the whole thing or graduate it over the next few years? The answer and opportunity will present itself I am sure. When the time is right.
Tonight I am tired but feeling both scared and excited. Scared that I am not ready to create the piece yet, but there is still time for that to become nervous energy and excited because , like everything with this wonderful indulgent piece, it feels right and the jigsaw keeps fitting in to place where it should be. I am still careful to go with it and not be too prescriptive, aside form the actual shape. This is hard as it goes against my nature as an organiser but actually it is bearable.