So its nearly here, or rather i am nearly there. Today was spent wading in the water, marking out the tide pattern for the return to the sea of the peice. Alan Hockett and I - Alan is the collaborator on the stop frame animation of the piece on Saturday, we worked out that the footage will make about 3 minutes of footage alltogether, a mammoth 5040 frames of data over 14 hours. A mammoth task and another lasting memory for the installation. A testament to the beleif that my friends and fellow creatives have in the piece in order to support my journey.

Day 40 is ominus with so many religious and biblical events. In the christian calender - lent was seen as a way to place god at the centre of the world and relfect, stemming from Jesus going into the desert to battle the devil. Moses spent 40 days and 40 nights to find contemplation and renewal. I guess thats what this has been to me a way to battle the demons and seek some form of peace and renewal, while constantly moving on and freeing myself from the past chains without major harm to self or others.

I looked today for someone who was blogging from the Camino de Santiago de Compostela but I think it is too early in the day, they are probably still walking, I thought it would be good to see what they are doing right now on their fortieth day, so close to thier destination, to walk up the cathedral steps after such a monumental journey.

I am still trying to work out my trip next year. For my fortieth birthday, do I go for the whole thing or graduate it over the next few years? The answer and opportunity will present itself I am sure. When the time is right.

Tonight I am tired but feeling both scared and excited. Scared that I am not ready to create the piece yet, but there is still time for that to become nervous energy and excited because , like everything with this wonderful indulgent piece, it feels right and the jigsaw keeps fitting in to place where it should be. I am still careful to go with it and not be too prescriptive, aside form the actual shape. This is hard as it goes against my nature as an organiser but actually it is bearable.

So again I am writng the bog late, its actually sunday morning and so I am being retrospective, listening to desert island discs the peoples choice and its been interesting to think about how people resonate towards music, and how it captures different emotions, memories and states of mind. I took part in the process a while back, mine included Nina Simone - Here comes the sun - a song Sean and I walked back up the Aisle at our wedding. Bizets - Pearl Fishers Duet, a constant companion throughout my life. Ralph Vaughn Williams - A Lark ascending, Elgars Cello concerto, The Clash - London Calling. I am listeniing to it on Iplayer so I dont know what the most popular track is going to be. But it seems that there is a shared enjoyment of certain tracks - anything by the beatles in its many guises, therie seems to be a british slant in the choices that have been made. Saterday - day 37 was spent moochong about - firstly on the art trail to see and support the artists, secondly to have a stroll, it was right that our first port of call was Alan Hocketts venue - a great friend of mine whose work I adore for its ghost like and haunting qualities and depictions of our local enviroment in a a new and exciting way. What i love about the trail is that it hosts artists who are all different and create unique pieces that inspire and inform. I believe Art trail means a lot to the artists involved. I observed one such artist setting up, a usually feisty individual with lack of respect for other people , neatly setting up there table full of information in such a proud way it was humbling to see that someone felt as proud as I was to be part of this fantastic network of artists.
Friends came over for supper last night, we made the best curries and sat and mulled over life on the deck while all the time the rain made it feel more like february rather than June. whats going on.. get me too my desert island!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b011ttf5

So, this is my first blog, I always hand write in my journal so this is a new expereince for me.
This morning Emma Douglas and I have been on the beach.
Emma is a worldly woman, who doesn't suffer fools gladly and sees life in a sensitive yet blunt way if ever the two should mix, and she tells you about it.
We took a stroll down to the beach, for the first time with a friend,  to talk through and explore the siting of the final installation piece.
The tides today are roughly the same as they ae going to be on the 18th and walking barefoot on the beach and mudline was actually quite a lovely experience. The mud is so silky before it gets cloggy under foot.
It seems like I am out of my comfort zone at the moment, challenging myslef by not taking the easier route for me by not using light as a projection and forcing myself to be more intuitive in the development of the piece on the day. Taking care to keep its integrity and its calmness. Putting into the piece what I hope will resonate from it as people participate, a special, sacred and natural space.

Prior to going to the beach, I started formalising the image for Pecha Kucha on Thursday - I still have a bit to go on that. Its quite hard to know what to talk about, without complying to the labels and expectations of what poeple come to hear and see about.. a work in progress.